Love, Compassion, and Discipline

I may give away everything I have, and I may even give my body as an offering to be burned. But I gain nothing if I do not have love. 1 Corinthians 13:3.

My wife and I have been having really deep discussions late at night these past few weeks. Last night, we were discussing our children and the things we pray for and want most for them. One of the major themes of our discussion was the character we want to see develop in them. My desire as I watch my 13-month-old son grow up is that he becomes a person that his friends will trust. Someone that they can count on to be there for them. If one of Asher’s friends has a problem at school or at home or anywhere else, they would know that Asher is trustworthy and compassionate. So many kids grow up without someone they can trust. It is sad to see kids who go through life not being able to talk to their parents about things or able to talk to a teacher about issues they may be facing. My wife and I pray that Asher would be the kind of person that other kids will come to when they are having those issues. We also pray that he will be able to come to us when he has issues arise in his life. Being in youth ministry, I have seen kids who are having problems and struggling with issues, but they are afraid to go to their parents because they think they may be yelled at. We are fully aware that this journey of parenting is not easy and we are just past the starting line, but we do hope and pray that Asher will feel free to come to us because we love him. We can work out the problems through looking at the Scriptures and do it together. It pains me to see kids who hide things from their parents because they are afraid of getting the tenth degree. Love and compassion are two vital parts of discipline. Without them, you drive a wedge between the disciplinarian and the one who needs the discipline. Every mistake we make and every struggle we face is an opportunity for us to come closer to God through His love and forgiveness. We should strive to do the same for our kids, and let’s pray that our kids will be able to do the same as they have their families.

Love Those Who . . .

I may give away everything I have, and I may even give my body as an offering to be burned. But I gain nothing if I do not have love. 1 Corinthians 13:3.

What is love? Is it a feeling, an emotion, a desire, or a commandment? Now, there are different kinds of love, and you can put a different kind of love to each of the words above. But what kind of love is the Apostle Paul writing about? I don’t think it is the romantic type of love that I have for my wife, and I don’t think it is the fatherly type of love I have for my son. I don’t think and I hope it isn’t the type of love I have for barbecue. So what kind of love is it? The Greek word Paul uses is agape. Agape love is not just unconditional love, but is primarily a love of will, not the emotions. Love with emotions can fade over time, but love out of will doesn’t fade. God’s will to love us will never fade; it is His nature to love us that way. We are called to love in the same way. I see two major areas where we as Christians fail to give agape love. The first is in the political arena. To clarify something, I said we as Christians, and we includes me. I am not excluding myself from this at all, as I am guilty of doing these things as well. How many times have you seen a Christian bad-mouth a politician about his policies? I know I have seen it quite often, and I have done a fair share myself. I have heard many liberal Christians slam Bush and McCain the last 8 years, and I have heard many conservative Christians slam Obama over the past couple years. So why do we do that? What gives us the right to slander others? Now, God definitely wants us to be involved in politics and stand up for truth and morality. We should use our voice of freedom to support legislation and policies that please God. If God’s people sit back and say nothing, then those who are using their voice will get done what they want to see happen. However, the way in which we use that voice should also reflect the love that God has for ALL people, including those who disagree with us in the political arena. That’s where the line between standing up for truth and slandering others gets crossed. What message am I sending to unbelievers through the way I talk about the politician I don’t support? Christians love everyone as long as they think like them and act like them? Here’s an example: Most of you know that I am somewhat of a gun fanatic, which may be putting it mildly. The current administration doesn’t exactly agree with me on gun legislation. One thing I have to remind myself of is that even though I don’t support much or any of the gun legislation that is supported by the administration, God loves each and every one of those politicians. How am I conveying that message by the way I speak about them? I don’t want to get all philosophical on you and say, “What Would Jesus Do?” But, what would He want us to do? Do you know that slander is the same as the ninth commandment, “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor?” How often do we bear false witness against a politician? How often do we do it to our actual neighbor? I am guilty of that quite often. What would the world be like if God didn’t have agape love for us? How would it be if His love was based on his emotions? How long would have people existed? I am pretty sure that once the forbidden fruit was eaten in the garden, the earth would have opened up and swallowed Adam and Eve. So how about we think about what we are going to say about someone before the evil malicious words come out of our mouths. Let’s think using agape love, love that is not based off of our emotions, but based of off who we are as a new creation in Christ Jesus our Lord.